Deep Sea Fishing

Well as you all might have not heard from me in a while, you now will. I have done some incredible changes in my life and for the record do not feel depressed anymore. Aaah yes, I can hear the cheers from across the room. So just to make you all understand what went down this is how that cookie crumbled.
For nine months I was living in Monterrey Mexico, hard at work trying to scrape some money together to move to Mexico City and begin a fresh chapter in the incredibly dull adventures of Jeandre Gerber. Well for nine months I was working and at the end had almost nothing to show for it, except a lot of bamboo artifacts that I hand created from nature's tallest grass. I'll add some snapshots at the bottom of the mail so you guys can see. The point is that through all the work and sweat I really didnt make the amount of money I was hoping to make. You see in all the other mails I was explaining how love from afar is more hazerdous to you health than not loving at all. I just coundt handle it anymore, so in the end I went on the mega move and said: SCREW THIS, I'm going with or without money it don't matter! Thus in the end I sold as much as I could, payed of most of my outstanding debt and had a staggering $2500 pesos to my name and a hand full of ideas. But in reality the future is always as clear as a muddy window and you can see the outlines of the creatures infront of you.
None the less I moved out of my house got on a bus and came down to the city of MExico. With no Idea what to do, I began scouring the internet for appartments and work. Thus far no work and a shabby little appartment in a not so well part of the city. I call it my own personal Ghetto. I got there with the help of a good friend of mine who has always helped me out in times of need. Yet I hate asking him to help me, it was my only shot and thank all goodness that he helped me out. With the money he sent me I could get a place and buy one of those inflatable matresses to let me not sleep on the cold concrete. It turned out that I also needed to buy a gas tank for warm water and for cooking, of which I couldnt do, because alas rent is expensive when you dont make money.
I had to improvise, not taking showers definitely was not an option. So I thought and I thought until I created what I call my very own Ghetto Solar Boiler. Basically it's a 4 liter water bottle with black tape and broken mirror pieces to reflect the rays of the cold winter sun on the bottle. SUCCESS!!! It only takes me about 4-5 hrs to heat up water but it turns out that man can use only 4 liters of water to have a complete shower! So now at least I have hot bathing water. But what about cooking? Well, cooking comes down to burning scrap on my roof and heating up canned foot or dead rats or anything that's got some calories.
I entitled the mail Deep Sea Fishing for a specific reason. You see my beautiful wife to be is but a princess and she is trapped in a castle. There is a dragon, this dragon is her paranoid and at times violent father who hates everything on earth and i believe he probably hates himself the most. The point being that from her I can expect only what she can do, but not really much more than that. You see there is this expression that states, TEACH A MAN TO FISH AND HE'LL EAT FOR A LIFE TIME! My answer to this is the following, how can you fish with your bare hands when you're floating in the middle of the ocean. I mean try it, go and try to fish tuna with your bare hands, or a swordfish or even a shark for that matter. Little does the expression explain that for fishing you need tools.
Well my friends as it turns out I am but a mere fisher without tools, drifted into the darkest and deepest part of the ocean of life. I know how to fish, the problem is that my little life raft did not come equiped with rods or nets. Let me explain.
I know have the opportunity to work as a translator for a company here, but there are a couple of snags to the riddle. I need a laptop to be able to work, yet here I find myself in the middle of getting a break with a wall as high as the great wall of china infront of me. I tried to get a laptop on credit, but alas it all went to nothing when I heard this morning that it's not gonna happen. Now I turn to the place where I least expect help to come from...you guys! I know that I can do it, I can move forward if I can just get a little help from my friends, and even the occasional stranger. I am the man on the road, where is my good samaritan?
That's one thing, the other thing is that I do not discriminate against any job whatsoever. Yet sadly many jobs do discriminate against me. As you people might or might not know, I have been an illegal alien in this fine country for years now. When I was was living in shallow waters it didnt matter too much, I could work on all the little things available, but now that is a problem. Most of the jobs I sought asked me for one thing...FM3!!!! Hear that word echo over the mountains. This isnt too expensive to obtain yet, try to do it when canned food is your best meal of the day, and when there really isnt many options out there. I dont have the economy to obtain this, which then puts me in the situation of having to work way way waaay outside of the box.
So here's my request. Help me obtain some tools in order to fish, and not have to ask for fish anymore. I would like to live in abundance, I really do...but for now I survive on Ghetto Tricks...
On the bottom of this mail I will tell you the two things I really need in order to have the tools and the means Deep Sea Fishing. I also have a Pay-Pal account open that you guys can donate to if you want. This obviously isn't an obligation but, it is an honest request. If we all just give a little bit of the abundance we have, then we all can be fine. I promise you guys that I am done with this Ghetto Tricks...I'm ready to be a master fisherman...just help me please?
PS:
I'll start showing u guys what it's like to live the Ghetto Life style as I was thinking in my time alone that maybe there are others that are suffering the same fate, and maybe a collective wisdom could be the answer to many problems.
And now as promised some pics of my art...and there is a donate button at the bottom...go ahead and donate...help me obtain my tools.
Laptop: $300 USD
FM3: $400 USD

Donate

Option 1 $5.00 Option 2 $10.00 Option 3 $20.00 Option 4 $50.00 Option 5 $100.00

Anarchy and the Spanish Mouse

Obviously the news of Mexico came to the family as a shock, a change that would radically redefine who we are. A new language, a new culture and even a new continent, I mean I have heard of moving, but this was more like ocean jumping. Either way, my family and I have always been the adventurous types and we could hardly say no to something this insane.

Mexico, the only thing that came to my mind at that moment was a little mouse screaming “andale andale arriba arriba!” then rush off to some distant hole in a wall. Either way my over active imagination would not cease to keep on thinking of the unimaginable possibilities that would be waiting for me there.

Yet before my great departure I thought it would only be right if I left my home continent with a big BIG bang. And thus my mind went into the deepest caverns of anarchy possible and formed a master plan to paint my school with a brush of chaos. I planned and planned until finally it all was ready. Gasoline to burn a gigantic Nirvana smiley face in the grass on the rugby field, a half a pound of home made smoke bomb, timers, firecrackers, wire cutters and the works. A few days prior to my plane leaving I went to work.

Like a ninja I crept through the darkness un-noticed by even the darkness itself, I approached my entry point of the school where I cut a small hole in the fence, like a floating mouse I crept through silently. Once I reached all of the checkpoints I previously established I placed my various contraptions with their timers to go off at the beginning of school that following Monday. According to my plan everything would blow the moment I am on the plane a few thousand feet in the air. From what I heard from my soon to be forgotten friends, it all went according to plan, apparently the culprit was never found, I wonder why?

The flight on the way to Mexico was nothing but action, five South-Africans and about twenty one suitcases made the journey more interesting that an elephant trying to balance itself on a tennis ball. We rushed from one gate to another trying to make it on time, hoping we didn’t miss our flight. This was definitely one of the most bonding activities you can do with your family, so if you ever find yourself having family issues, just migrate to another continent it will bring you all together.

After a twenty seven hour flight we finally got to Mexico City, where the people were tiny and the language was strange, yet still I was just looking for that mouse. I asked my father if this was the place we we’re going to stay at of which he replied “No Jeandre, we’re going to Monterrey.” Well, that was only an hour and a half more to go, and then finally I could meet the place that would house me for more than a decade.

My mind was still wondering on how Monterrey would look like, and how the people were, if it was as safe or unsafe as South-Africa. The most important question was, how are roads and can I still Rollerblade?

Finally we made it to Monterrey International Airport, although to me this was the least “international” looking airport I have seen during the entire journey over here. We finally got our bags, all twenty one of them, and approached the door to the outside. As the automatic doors open I felt the sudden slap of forty degrees Celsius hit my entire body like a curtain of hell. The air in my lungs became like that of an oven and my body gradually began to lose strength. “Water, water!” my tongue cried out as my skin started to turn raison. We got into the car that was waiting for us, and as I looked to the scenery I began to see what the cartoons spoke of. There was dust and tumbleweeds dancing in the distance, and definitely no place for me to skate. I just kept on hoping that the scenery would change, and eventually it did. There appeared a city in the distance, Monterrey, and as we kept on advancing closer to the high mountains my spirit began to lift, it turned out that my new house was bigger than my last. I was surrounded by trees and ample places to play at, to create more unique and interesting games to entertain my over active imagination. I said to myself “I can do this!” but little did I know what I was saying I could do.

Only the future would hold the secrets that were blinded to my present, for now I was good…but for tomorrow, I just had no idea!

Origens

Now thinking back on that large continent I would have never imagine me winding up here. My childhood was like any other yet I always could see things other people couldn't. At a very young age I would storm into a room telling my mother the amazing things I experienced that day, whether it would be a dragon roaming the fields in this African border town, or the masses of creature that would lurk in our backyard. Generally my comments would be met with slight laughter and a "Oh Jeanie, what an imagination you have on you!"

The fact of the matter is that at that age it all seemed real, there was no fiction. Countless days I would walk the area and find new adventures, new stories to tell. If I could only find someone who would accompany me in these grand excursions I would be happy, and for a while there was none. Until of course Gambit came into the picture.

This saint bernard wasn't like any other, he befriended a sheep and roamed freely where he wished. Generally his wishes would be to follow me around and keep me from harms way, and that he did. I remember one time I decided to go for a swim, or should I rather say bottom of the pool exploration. The only downfall to this was that I could not swim yet, but as I believed I could breathe underwater like some mystical sea creature I soon found out that Gambit differed from my opinion. He jumped in after me and grabbed by the hair, hauling me to safety.

And so the adventures continued in Outshoring, right next to the military base where my father worked at. Gambit and I soon found a new friend to dive into our fantasies, the daughter of our neighbor, Sherese. She was about my age and was the perfect addition to our boy/dog duo.

One time Sherese and I decided to become rabbits, hence we needed to look like rabbits. After a long search in my mother's kitchen we found the perfect ingredient to our costumes, flour! After carefully removing all our clothing we began with the flouring process, and thus became two of the fasted and greatest rabbits on the planet, sadly my mom did not find this as entertaining as we did.

And so life was pretty laid back, especially if your three years old, as we had ample times to stimulate the imagination. Soon I realized that dogs can't speak human languages, and that the creatures I could see was nothing more than an overactive imagination. As time continued society began to place their dreaded boundaries to an infants realities, and broadened my sight into the world of logic and reason. Yet my mind never stopped creating new stories and new tales, yet I learnt to keep them to myself, otherwise I would be subjected to mocking by my dull and boring peers.

Time progressed and one day we went on a vacation for a couple of days. I can't tell you where or what we did because that memory is a foggy as the steam from a train. What I do remember is coming back home and looking for my furry companion only to find a long line of ants tearing off the flesh of his body. My first encounter with death was probably one that lingered with me well into my teens. That was the first time I actually weeped, my heart broke and I felt pain like I have never felt it before. After the death of Gambit, life just didn't seem so cheery here in Outshoring, I still could find some adventures, yet they just didn't measure up.

Soon we moved, and moved again, and then moved again. Until I we landed in the last place I would spend my days in Africa, Pretoria. Apparently nowadays the names have changed to these locations and seeing as I haven't been there for over a decade, I won't bother writing them out. In Pretoria I became fascinated with melee weaponry. Shurikens, swords and even the occasional acid bombs I would conjure in my house as my entertainment. I still would invent games and adventures but nowadays they were a bit more mature, with slight twists and turns.

The beauty of my childhood was that everything was possible, my mind could wander and there would be nothing to stand in its way. I knew I had the support from my mother, and my overworked father in any endeavor I would engage in. Those were glory days, those were days of happiness and sunshine. Little did I know that everything around me would change, instantaneously my reality would shift in a new direction. And it all started with the following words :"What would you guys think of us moving to Mexico?"

I said to myself: "Mexico?"